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Saturday, May 9, 2009



What type of parenting style do you use? Find out by taking this quiz. Answer the questions honestly, based on your beliefs and what you would really say or do, not how you think it "should" be answered:

1. What is the parent's job?

1. To make children behave and to obey authority and rules.
2. To provide constant supervision/structured rules so children will act/choose "right."
3. To teach children the life skills they need to be self-disciplined, responsible adults.
4. To make sure children have a happy, carefree childhood.
5. To let children learn the proper skills and behavior on their own

2. Who is responsible for controlling the child's behavior?

1. Parents must stay in charge and children should obey their rules.
2. Children should do what the more experienced and knowledgeable parents say.
3. Parents are responsible for teaching children behaviors and skills they need for self-control.
4. Parents should explain to the children why they should behave and ask for their cooperation.
5. Children can figure out their own limits through trial and error.

3. Who has rights?

1. The parents have all the rights, just because they are adults; children have few or no rights.
2. Parents have superior knowledgeable and experience; therefore they have more rights.
3. Parents and children both have the right to be treated with dignity and respect.
4. Children's rights and needs are more important than the parents.
5. Children have rights as long as the parents aren't inconvenienced.

4. Who get's respect?

1. Children are expected to respect parents, but parents are not obligated to respect children.
2. Children have to earn their parents' respect before they will receive it.
3. All people deserve to be treated respectfully, regardless of age or position.
4. Parents should respect their children so the children will be happy.
5. Children act disrespectful now and then, it's no big deal.

5. How are mistakes handled?

1. Children must be punished if they break the rules. The punishment must either make the child feel bad or inconvenience the child somehow.
2. Parents can correct children's mistakes by expressing disappointment, offering constructive criticism, urging children to try harder, and telling them how to fix the mistake and prevent it later.
3. Children can learn lessons from mistakes and how to fix them or prevent them in the future.
4. It is a parent's responsibility to fix children's mistakes or protect children from the negative effects.
5. Others (besides the parents and children) are probably to blame for the children's mistakes.

6. How are problems solved and decisions made?

1. Choices are made within limits that respect the rights and needs of others.
2. The problems will go away on their own; if not, the parents can deal with it later.
3. Parents have the right answers, so the children should follow their advice.
4. Parents should monitor their children's activities, set goals for the child, and offer rewards or incentives for reaching the goals.
5. Parents should try to find out what the children want and make them happy.

7. How are negative feelings handled?

1. Parents shouldn't try to change their children's negative feelings but can teach them how to express them appropriately.
2. Everything will go smoother if children keep their negative feelings to themselves.
3. Children should not express negative feelings because it shows defiance and disrespect.
4. Children should think and feel what their parents think and feel is "right."
5. Parents should protect or rescue children from negative feelings.

8. Who decides how children should behave, which interests they pursue and the goals they set?

1. Parents can teach children positive behavior skills so children can set and reach healthy goals.
2. Children can figure out how to behave and what interests/goals to pursue through trial and error.
3. Parents should tell children what to do and the goals to pursue and make them follow through.
4. Parents should set high standards for children and choose interests/goals that will help the children succeed as adults.
5. Children should be allowed to do whatever interests/goals they want so they'll be happy.

9. Who makes the rules and how are they enforced?

1. Children can have choices, within reasonable limits and understand the value of the rules.
2. If parents set and enforce limits, their children will feel too constricted and rebel.
3. Parents should tell their children what to do, and children should obey without question.
4. Parents can set structured rules and correct children with constructive criticism and advice.
5. If parents politely remind children to behave, they eventually will.

10. How can parents motivate children?

1. Parents can teach their children the value of tasks so they are self-motivated to do them.
2. Children should be responsible for motivating themselves.
3. Children can be motivated through commands and threats.
4. Children can be motivated by rewards and incentives, acceptance and praise.
5. If parents do enough for their children, the children will be happy and motivated.

11. How do parents discipline?

1. Parents can explain children's behavior choices and hold them accountable for their decisions.
2. Children can monitor their own behavior.
3. Punishment should be uncomfortable or inconvenient so misbehavior will stop.
4. Parents should make their children feel bad for misbehaving and take away special privileges.
5. Parents shouldn't punish their children too often or they will lose their children's love.




Scoring:

You will have five totals--one for each of the five parenting styles. Your highest score shows your dominant parenting style.

* Power Patrol: Add 1 point for every (a.) answer on questions 1 through 5, and 1 point for every (c.) answer on questions 6 through 11.
* Perfectionistic Supervisor: Add 1 point for every (b.) answer on questions 1 through 5, and 1 point for every (d.) answer on questions 6 through 11.
* Balanced: Add 1 point for every (c.) answer on questions 1 through 5, and 1 point for every (a.) answer on questions 6 through 11.
* Overindulger: Add 1 point for every (d.) Answer on questions 1 through 5, and 1 point for every (e.) Answer on questions 6 through 11.
* Avoider: Add 1 point for every (e.) answer on questions 1 through 5, and 1 point for every (b.) answer on questions 6 through 11.




credit: parentstoolshop


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